Now I have made my self-care goals – then what?
We have all begun new habits of caring for ourselves and then started ‘forgetting ‘ them and/or suddenly found that we have more urgent things to do than caring for ourselves. I want to reassure you that you are not the only one to find your willpower and enthusiasm is not enough to continue the new habit after a few weeks, or even a few days. Your life has not changed. It continues to expect you to care for everyone and everything else first. Perhaps deep down you also secretly expect that care for yourself comes only after care for others.
To continue – events and people in your life often sabotage your best efforts to care for yourself first. It is not enough that you have made wonderful goals to care for yourself. It is certainly only a beginning when you tell those around you that things are changing around here and that you are now going to do …whatever your ‘caring for yourself’ habit is. You have to ensure it happens by planning for success.
Step three: Goals can remind you to persist when your life threatens to take you over again. Make them a visual reminder as to why you are creating this new ‘caring for yourself’ habit.
- Have your ‘caring for yourself’ goals easily visible to you. Place them somewhere you can look at them any time to keep you motivated. There will be times you will forget why you wanted this new habit so badly, and your goals will remind you. Have them easily visible so when you feel tired, stressed, worried, or too busy to keep that weekly appointment with yourself, you will remember why you want this new ‘caring for yourself’ habit.
- Make your goals visually pleasing and powerful.You can use colour, laminate them, or write them on a lovely piece of paper. To help my ideas flow more freely, I often use a creative mind map.
- Find the right tool so you can plan your week carefully every week. Buy a calendar or a diary where you can easily see the whole month or week at a glance, and look at it at least once a day, preferably in the morning. There are many very good diaries which open up to the whole week and the Flylady website has excellent calendars
- Place your new planning tool and your page of goals together where you can see them easily. You can sellotape your goals inside your diary, or pin them up near your calendar. Place your diary or calendar in a room you spend a lot of time in, such as your kitchen or bedroom or office. You can use your I-pad or laptop for your goals and weekly calendar instead if those wonderful tools are always with you.
Step four talks about how to plan using a dairy or calendar.
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