Are you frustrated about the lack of homework happening in your home? Do you find it hard to be consistent and persistent with your child and their homework?
Webster’s dictionary defines persistence as “the quality of being persistent”. And what is persistence? It is “lasting or enduring tenaciously, especially in the presence of obstacles, opposition and discouragement”. Just like a good coach and parent is really.
Positive persistence is when you continue to quietly and firmly make a time for homework each day. When you regularly sit down with your child doing homework, set clear and fair boundaries around when and how and where homework is done, and check carefully that it is done.
The positively persistent parent does not stay flustered, worried, angry or surprised. They may often feel those emotions, but they put them to one side as quickly as possible, and concentrate on what is important. Homework is important. Regular homework enables your child to do well in class, and now it is homework time.
It does not matter how slowly you go so long as you do not stop.
Persistent, consistent effort is the key to regular homework in your house. When, for whatever reason, homework doesn’t happen, realise that this failure to do the homework today is an opportunity to try again more successfully tomorrow. Sit down and positively plan how you can make homework happen.
This is what parenting is all about really. You have the responsibility to train your child in the skills and attitudes they need to do well in life. An invaluable attitude you can help them develop is that good results in life take persistent effort. You have to show them this by ‘doing’ effort. Both you and your child can put effort into making homework a habit.
Persistence about homework happening works!
To all those flustered and worried parents out there – remember that you are the ‘boss’. It’s up to you too how much, and when, and what your child does for homework. You can negotiate with them, but don’t leave the decisions up to them. Your child doesn’t earn the money that keeps your household going, nor does he or she always have the wisdom to know how important homework is for their learning future. You do. But in order to take up your rightful authority in your home, you have to assume the role of authoritatively persistent coach. And when you do, your child will show opposition, whining, crying and for some, major melt-downs. Keep a calm, cool head especially then.
It’s often the last key in the bunch that opens the lock
Your positive persistence will certainly go through a testing period. I encourage you to not be discouraged. When you see your child sitting down doing their homework without any effort on your part you will understand through your own personal experience what it means to endure tenaciously, especially because the ‘obstacle, opposition and discouragement’ will probably be having a meltdown right before your very eyes.
Persisting in spite of the resistance you find from your child, your own self, your busy life isn’t easy, but it’s worth the battle scars. If you positively persist, your children will learn a life skill on how to persist and succeed in spite of obstacles, so they continue to succeed beyond others’ and their own expectations.
Check out my other postings for more ideas on how to support your child to do well. My next blog will give further ideas on how to successfully help your child do regular homework.
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